and finally, after much prodding and poking from all of his friends, our hero sits down and begins to type. 

the following is absolutely true.  don't ask who it's about- she knows.

My Muse

What exactly is a muse?
Well, according to Merriam-Webster, it’s this:

Main Entry: MUSE

Function: noun

Etymology: Middle English, from Middle French, from Latin Musa, from Greek Mousa

Date: 14th century

1capitalized : any of the nine sister goddesses in Greek mythology presiding over song and poetry and the arts and sciences

2: a source of inspiration; especially : a guiding genius

    For our purposes, we’ll use the latter, a source of inspiration.  After all, the reason I’m writing this is because of my newly rediscovered Muse.  We’ll capitalize that because I think it’s the right thing to do.   The capitalization implies some degree of importance, and since she’s quite important, she gets capitalized. 

    I mention newly rediscovered, since she was once the source of my inspiration many years ago when I was much younger and far more open to wonder than now.  In that day, my creative spells typically led me to pen such things as Valentine’s Day cards and stories of puppy love and other things that ooze from the mind of a young boy learning that girls aren’t just not icky, but quite alluring and very intriguing.  In the present day, with the loves and losses of adulthood, creativity took a back seat to reality.  My muse had been out of the picture for years and nothing had ever been able to quite replace her.  Many came close, and served me well on a purely temporary basis.  While temporary, they weren’t unappreciated, just not permanent in any way.  Hopefully, (now that she’s returned from not a place, but a time) she’s back to stay.  And if she’ll continue to be my Muse, I’ll reward her in the only way I know I can: I’ll be there in any way I can and do my best to show my appreciation.  She will also, of course, get first dibs to sample whatever my newly re-opened mind may spill out.  She’ll likely wind up editing some of if she’ll oblige me, since she’s far more intelligent and well-spoken than I.

    I’ve noticed that most of my musings over the past decade or so have been rather cynical.  I suppose that’s due to a few unfortunate chains of events in my life. Everyone wants to be happy, everyone wants to excel, and everyone wants love (in one way or another), and when enough of these wants aren’t satisfied cynicism takes over and the wonders of life cease to be wonders.  Perhaps that’s what happened to me.  I just got fed up with life not really being what I wanted.  That’s the key: “What I wanted”.  Never looking at a bigger picture is a dangerous method of seeking happiness and contentment.  It wasn’t until recently that I learned that sometimes what other people want is the key to MY happiness. 

    It suddenly hit me one day that if I could make someone else happy (by doing for them what THEY wanted or needed), their happy would just spill over onto me.  Learning this was the source of my liberation from my own self-deprecating misery.  I finally learned that I wasn’t making myself happy because I wasn’t trying to make others happy.  That liberation became my new focus, my goal, and my new reason for being.  Doing for others makes me happy.  Simplistic, but extremely rewarding!  Now don’t go thinking that I’m only out to make others happy, I still do things for myself on occasion but they usually wind up involving others.  The smile of another person is a powerful force.

     As I write this, I’m fortunate enough to be connected to the Internet.  This amazing entity brings the world closer together, and what’s better than that?  I like to be aware of things, so I leave my email program running in the background.  A few minutes ago, I got a message.  From Her.  She mentioned that she used to love reading the letters I’d sent and the cards I made for her.  Wait until she sees this!
     So, back to my Muse, since that’s the reason you’ve bothered to stay tuned-in for this long.

     The first time she was in my life, my Muse was to be my romantic partner, if romance is even possible between two children just starting to see that loving someone who wasn’t related to us was possible.  This time around, our involvement is not a romantic one, but that doesn’t mean she can’t still move me to create the way she did all those years ago.  In fact, the simple fact that I’m mentioning all of this in a very “stream of consciousness” way of getting thoughts out is proof that she is once again moving me to create.  Ahhh…. The sweetness of the unclogging one’s mind is not only liberating, but very cleansing to the soul.  Freedom to create without the fear that the creations are so somber that nobody will feel comfortable experiencing them is such a beautiful feeling.  I cannot express the gratitude I have for her, and she probably doesn’t even realize what she’s done.

    As the time I have for writing now grows short, I must put away my mouse, turn off the monitor, and go back to what the responsibilities of the “real world” have in store for me.  I will surely continue this, once time allows.  If things go according to plan, I will be spending time with my Muse soon and this will likely give me plenty more to feed my mind.  It’s truly amazing to me that a person can have such an impact on someone else’s life, by doing nothing more than talking and sharing thoughts.  Until recently, I’d never have believed it.

    I believe now.